HALLOWEEN.....

Last night after the guys got the gun urge out of their system, we carved pumpkins...er, I mean *they* carved pumpkins. I took pictures, cleaned out the fridge and cleaned up dinner dishes.
Every year about this time we all gather in the kitchen and start shouting ideas at Handsome Hubby (Master Carver). I always have a cat (surprise, surprise). The kid's ideas vary, but it's always something other than two triangles for eyes, one triangle for nose, and jagged mouth....so....that means I can't carve it. Sweet Son and Dear Daughter usually help some, and have a grand time digging out the goo and making comments that turn my stomach. This year Sweet Son took up carving himself. He carved the third one from the left and had a great time doing it!
Pumpkin carving is a tradition in our household, and was in my household as a kid. My Daddy's birthday is on Halloween, so it was always lively and festive at our house, I kinda took that mood into my own family. I had no idea that there were people who didn't participate in the fun festivities until we started homeschooling ( I showed up at a fall event with ghost treats, argh) .....so I read up on the history and was appalled. However, I am going to take the Victorian stance on this. The Victorians (early 1900's) made Halloween a "party time"....it originally started as a young adult celebration. They bobbed for apples, made cards, played games to "for tell" ones future spouse, and pretty much introduced the "fall festival". So...here's to some fun fall times.....





Here's the first couple of pumpkins Handsome Hubby Carved.
Julia got her pumpkin carved first, she gets sleepy around 8:30.


The long awaited for "goo moment". Sweet Son couldn't get enough....Dear Daughter was finished after the first couple of handfuls.

Handsome Hubby getting ready to carve. (He's *so* cute!)



Dear Daughter didn't last until all the carving was over. She made her a bed on the sofa so she could be near us and fell asleep. Miss Mary (kitty cat) liked her idea.

Being Thankful....

The past few weeks I've had a party almost daily. A party for myself...and pity was the only guest. When I took a step back and took a look I was ashamed....the things that I worry over are so small compared to what they could be, or what I see others struggling with. Given the event of a tragedy, they would mean next to nothing. I started considering the things I was thankful for.....salvation, my husband and children, my marriage, my extended family, my friends, my church, my home, my health, etc. etc.
I decided that I need to get back to finding pleasure in everyday small things....I've pretty much always been a person that could find something enjoyable no matter what my surroundings. Whether it be a tree gently swaying outside of a window, the sound of rain, a cat swishing its tail, the clouds, the sun...something.. It's always there, it's just whether I take the time to consider it. Yesterday, Julia and I sat and watched a squirrel digging and scurrying and carrying it's bounty away. A common sight, one easily passed over, but enjoyable.
I also come to the conclusion I need to *slow* down. Mentally more than anything. I had gotten into a mode of not focusing on the task at hand, but projecting onto the next thing that needed to be done. This rat race produces anxiety, stress, and leaves me feeling exhausted at the end of the day. I also don't give the needed attention to my children during the day when I am so engrossed in "doing and going and getting". Being there means more than *being* there. :-)

Our lifestyle does require that I multitask, stay pretty much busy, carry on more than one conversation at a time, and being able to switch gears quickly and smoothly. I do nearly everything during the day with one of the kids talking to me. I can't always take the time to do things how I want to, when I want to. But what I can do is make the best of the moment. If the moment is stressful, I can handle it with grace. If the moment is hurried, I can slow my mind. I can accomplish these things with Him who has has brought me this far, I can hand Him the worries and fretfulness, the cares and burdens, the fear and intimidation.
And He will carry the load.

Privacy....or the lack there of...

La Toilette. About the only place, recently, that I'm alone....well,not really alone, because I have many conversations through the bathroom door with my kids. This is, however, a step up. Not so many years back the kids, or at least one of them sat at my feet while I was on the toilet, or in my lap, or played with hair curlers in the floor.

I *love* homeschooling, but if there is anything I struggle with it's the lack of privacy....or lack of minutes I have alone. Everyone needs a few minutes alone at times. Sweet Son is 12 and Dear Daughter is 10 and they've always been home w/me....they've never been to public school (gasp, gasp). When they were little, I didn't have to worry much about what I said at the doctor's office, what they heard in my phone conversations, etc. etc. But now it's a real issue.
Earlier this year I had a hysterectomy. My kids went with me to *every* doctor's visit. In fact they were both with me at the initial visit just for a check up when Doc first thought there was something wrong. I was scared....but I had to gather myself together and go out and tell my kids it was "no big deal" that they needed to run a few tests. There sat both kids leafing through publications on breast cancer, ovarian and cervical cancer etc. (the only reading material in the office) Immediately both of them froze. and started to worry. And wanted to come back with me for the tests. Er, no honey, I don't think that is a good idea. (internal ultrasound). Both of the kids became well educated on fibroid tumors and learned about a my surgery and was there the day of.
Another issue for me is the buying of personal items. The kids are old enough now to send a few isles over and browse. But they both love looking through my cart. ARGH. Some things I just don't want them to see."What is this, Mom?" Gee Whiz.
Phone conversations are always monitored. Most of the time by dear daughter.....LOL. Very curious little lady, she is. For the most part the kids go w/me to the grocery, dentist, doctor, errands, well, just about anything I have to do. For the most part I enjoy it.
Every couple of months my parent's will offer to keep them for an afternoon or overnight. I really enjoy the first couple of hours. After that, my need to be alone or have privacy starts waning...if they stay over night, by the next morning I'm down right anxious for them to get home....LOL
I think about how quickly the past 10 and 12 years have passed...I don't have that many more left with them as children...so I'm more than willing to forgo my privacy (and maybe even a tad of my sanity) to have the time with them.

Being Nice......

Being mean, angry, vindictive, or mad is exhausting. It's unrewarding and much of the time unproductive.
I had a very long day in town yesterday with my kids. We were there about 12 hours, doing errands, kiddos had classes, and we done some volunteer work. I ran into a couple of people who were just not being nice. I don't get it. Why not be nice...it feels better than being mean, it looks better than being mean, it's less exhausting than being mean, it's just PLAIN BETTER than being mean.

I'm not going to discuss one of my encounters of the "un-nice"...but the other incident happened at Kroger gas station. I carefully maneuvered my car to get a space at the pump and was about a fourth of the way in when, from the other direction, a person zipped right in the other three quarters of the way, stopped and starred at me and raised her eye brows, when I met her eyes, she looked away. I don't know why, but this struck me funny, I wandered what, in her life, had made her want to be mean.....Her grumpy look and need to be first made me laugh. Then ultimately made me feel sorry for her. I calmly backed out and went to another space. What did she get out of that? not sure. Gas fill up 10 seconds before me? Looking "big and bad" in front of her kids sitting in the back seat? Was she taking out on me her anger and need for control over someone in her life? Who knows.
But I've always been curious as to why people, on a regular basis, choose not to be nice. I know there are days when everyone gets mad or grumpy....and I know there are times when anger, used in the right way, can be a motivator....I'm sure that's how many of our laws are made and bills are passed. And I'm sure that it's a big part of battle field survival on the war front. However, most anything , in our every day lives, can be done with respect and with out all of the anger and huff gruff.

People who go out of their way to annoy, embarrass, harass, put-down, or one-up another person are sad folks. AND they are waiting for you to react in kind...
Same for those who are "sappy sweet" but internally vindictive and ill-will plotters.

Genuine nice is a stress reliever, a calming agent, a good example, a good night's rest producer, and it makes you (and those around you) smile.

Being nice is doing something good from your heart for the person who has wronged you.
Sometimes that's difficult. But, always is rewarding.

I get mad or angry at times and sometimes get the "un-nice" urge, but if I use my energy to something more productive I feel better every time.
If I let something that happened in my past, produce anger all of the time, then that person or event is controlling me and my life. If I let it go, give it to the Lord, and live..things are better and I'm a nicer person. :-)

Mothers and Children.........

I, up until the past year, had personally never met a female who didn't want children. I knew they were out there, but I just personally never had the chance to chat with one. (maybe it's my choice of company, don't meet many motherless children at homeschool groups LOL)

I've met those who couldn't have children. I have been a person who thought I couldn't have children ( or at least bring a living child into the world) at one point. It was heart wrenching and sad. I've met ladies whose husbands didn't want children. I listened to them lament over the fact that their husbands were too childish and caught up in their own lives to have children. I've also met, the "we're not ready yets" who want children in a few years. Then I met Millie (name has been changed).

I met Millie about a year ago at a nursing home. My family has always done quite a bit of volunteering at nursing homes and thoroughly enjoyed the crafts and events we helped out in.
On this particular day, I was waiting for the kids to finish a craft and I wondered in a room and there sat Millie, tears running down her face. Millie was 91.
I took her hand and sat with her. She started talking and I started weeping with her. She talked to me about her life, how successful she had been. The countries she visited, the classes she taught, the plays she had seen. She described the house she had lived in, the cars she had drove. She even mentioned the fashionable clothes she had worn. Then she told me about her decision not to have children. Millie was married to her husband for about fifty years. She told me they were "too busy" for the chaos children brought to lives, didn't want to put the energy, time or money into having children. Her husband had his hobbies, she had hers and their life was full. Millie told me she had never been more wrong about anything.
She said the biggest regret she has is not having children. "Look at me," Millie sobbed, "I sit here and watch children come in and comfort their parents, and watch the parent's eyes light up. I have none of that. I've missed everything."
I tried in vain, to comfort Millie. I left there sick to my stomach.
I've never been able to imagine what it would be like not to want children. I've wanted children as far back as I can remember. I wanted children when I was wagging around my baby dolls. I wanted children when I stuffed my cats into baby clothes and tried to cram bottles in their mouths. I wanted children when I babysat my neighbor's kids. I wanted children when I sat in the doctor's office and listened to him explain why I kept miscarrying. I've always wanted children. I think God designed us ladies that way.

While I've still never met a young lady who has told me she doesn't ever want children. I hear of them, and my response has been, well if they don't want children, they are better off without them....but now I think of Millie. I'm not quite sure what the answer is, but I can't imagine living my life without children.

Just my thoughts for today......

Living it.....Loving it.....

I know I have several homeschooling families reading my blog, and so if you are one of them, this post is probably not very insightful....however, I also have friends and family reading who are very curious to how we spend our time, why handsome hubby and myself feel like *we* can give our children a good education, why we aren't worried about socialization, and don't our kids want to go to public school????
The above pic is of Sweet Son volunteering at our local public school (5/6 center). He is helping out at the Health camp. He worked with several kids, enjoyed the Senior football players helping out and just adored the "drunk glasses". And guess what??? He carried on intelligent conversation with the Senior guys, the coach, the teachers, adult visitors, and the children. Hmmm...Socialization was the *big scare* when we first embarked on the endeavor, I'm not very concerned now. From Webster's Online Dictionary: Socialization: To make Social, to fit or train for a social environment.
Handsome Hubby and myself are pleased that our children socialize with all different age groups, can carry on a conversation, without prodding, with a three year old, up to a 100 year old.





Dear Daughter also volunteering at the Health Fair (thanks Mrs. Libby). Helping the kids build a healthy snack.
Here Julia is working on a budgeting assignment. I taught a budgeting class at our local community action. The kids helped out a lot. Handsome Hubby and I figure that if we give the children lots of different learning opportunities, in many different environments, with many different people (ages and otherwise)...they will be well rounded and prepared. Don't know about the future, but I am proud of them!
Here Sweet Son and Dear Daughter deliver food with the Feed America Back Pack program to our local schools. Mrs. Libby took her time to teach the kids about the hungry children in our small county and what they can do to help. Alex is also working on a paper for his geography class concerning World Hunger. It was surprising to the kids (and me) how many people were in need of food in our area.
Kiddos unloading boxes for a couple of different food programs for our hometown.
Julia learning her CPR. Alex has been certified since last year (recently recerted). Both kids enjoy the Red Cross and are trained in first aid, CPR, and have a babysitter's certification.

Sweet Son and Dear Daughter in their Red Cross Gear working the Edmonson County Chamber Breakfast. They love working in our county (me, too!).

And, No, neither Alex or Julia, to this point, want to go to public or private school.....both have expressed their desire, adamantly, to homeschool......I don't know what the future holds, but for now, this is our life.
Our days go something like this:
Start at7:30ish. Bible reading, Reading aloud....Alex goes to work on his online classes, lots of research, posting to forums, and papers to write. I work with Julia on her math and grammar.
Both kids read literature selections. Spelling, critical thinking. History, Science.....Typing instruction. Visits to national geographic websites....Fox News, CNN, Washington Post for current events. Some days we work on 4-H projects, usually at least 3 days out of the week we do an outside activity, Red Cross, 4-H, Community Service, Library activities...Alex is on the WKU Forensics (speech/debate) Team, and we also try to see our family.
Other than that, we learn as much as we can about life. I make sure both of my kids know how to shop, pay for their items, what to do in an emergency if we are out, how to use the Library system for anything w/out having to ask for help, How much electric costs, where to pay for it, how to fill up the car with gas and pay, checking oil, being kind, doing laundry, where our trash goes, what accrued interest is, how we borrow money...yada, yada...you get the picture.....
Well, that's about it....
oh and we show our children LOVE.....between Handsome hubby and myself....from us to them....and depend on our Heavenly Father.....Beth

Family Life....

I'm gonna get on my soap box here......if you're not conservative or family oriented now's the time to click the little red X on the top right of your screen. :-)

The lack of accountability is destroying the family unit...it makes me so sad. It's slowing deteriorating the stability our children are due. It's undermining the husband/wife relationship, and totally blasting away at our relationships with God. It seems our society is always looking for someone to lay the blame on. From Washington right down to our living rooms, it's a daily occurrence.
Divorce seems to be the "in" right now. It has effected many of my family and friends, but thank God not my home. I am not above any of these people, nor is my husband. It's a daily prayer for me and Handsome Hubby, to keep us together. I'm not at all certain of all the going ons in a failing marriage, but lack of accountability kinda jumps out. I am in the opinion of men having the head of the household status. It's manly, nice for the wife, comforting to the children, AND it's biblical. There is very little that Handsome Hubby and myself disagree on, but, he has the final say in the event that we can't get it together. Marriage is strengthening, it's God's plan for man and woman (don't even get me started on Homosexuality). I firmly believe the lack of accountability that leads to many destroyed families, thus the infidelity, arguments, power battles, etc. It's so sad, it makes me want to stand up and fight for the family unit, for our children. For them not to make Divorce the norm in their lives.

Handsome Hubby and myself have been married for almost fifteen years. A far cry from my parents 37 and my granparent's 57. But I love married life, I enjoy married life and make an effort to make Handsome Hubby happy and content, I don't down him, say he gets on my nerves, ask him to get out of the house, etc. Why? Because I love him, and I wouldn't want him to say those things to me (which he doesn't). I once read a book that suggested, no matter how miserable you are, spend a few days doing all you can to make your spouse happy. I like that suggestion.
Handsome Hubby and myself to little things for each other...like when I'm in town, I might drop by and bring Jarrod ice cream and a kiss. I might surprise him and meet him at the office for lunch, leave him love notes, make his favorite dinner, give spontaneous hugs, etc. It makes him smile and feel loved.
Handsome Hubby brings me flowers, rubs my feet, treats me to lotions, grills me yummy chicken, fixes broken things in the house, calls to see how I am, gives me hugs and kisses, etc. It makes me smile and feel loved.
Ultimately, we are responsible for our own actions, good, bad, or somewhere in between....it's our choice and we make it.
Children are the ultimate benefactors of accountable parents who make an effort in their marriage. They feel comfortable in it, there's balance in a home that has Mother and Father under one roof, loving each other.
We had our nephew with us today in the car after church, when we pulled in our carport, Handsome Hubby and myself shared a long kiss. Nephew says, YUCK! GROSS!
Sweet Son says, "aw, they do that all the time, they just smooch and smooch"
LOL
Let your children know how much you love each other and how much you love them....it's valuable!

Responsibility and Accountability go hand in hand and strengthens the family. Love your spouse, love your children, and above all Love and Serve God....

Beth